Brrrr!

So, I took myself off to Tim Horton's coffee shop to do some work last week. It was hot outside, and I figured it would be cool and comfortable inside. Boy, was I in for a shock.

Yes, it was cool - in fact, very cool, bordering on freezing. I stuck it out for a while, but after half an hour, couldn't take it any more.

I don't have problems with the cold - heck, I live in Winnipeg, the "Brrrr!" capital of Canada. Nature's cold is something I love. But the artificial kind? That's a whole other matter.

According to Wikipedia, air conditioning is the removal of heat from indoor air for thermal comfort. Not ALL the heat, just enough for thermal comfort. However, many stores, especially the smaller kind with doors opening on a regular basis - coffee shops, restaurants, etc. - seem to think that if they remove all the heat, that will compensate for the many times people come and go. Unfortunately, the result is that it's often too cold for most people who stay.

I've thought about carrying my own personal thermometer when I go out for coffee or something to eat so I can tell management when it's too cold. But you'd think they'd be able to figure it out for themselves when they see people still wearing their outside coats and/or putting on extra layers.

A few questions ...
Is there a standard for inside/outside temperature ratios?
Is it cheaper to cool than to heat?
Are the low temps meant to hurry us out?
Is there any way those places can carry blankets?

Trust me - I've asked about that last one on many an occasion.

Okay, so clearly I don't get the whole air conditioning thing. Didn't have it growing up, don't like it in the house, rarely turn it on in the car - even the low setting ain't quite low enough. And while I've tried to get used to it, there's something about the natural versus artificial thing that makes it all but impossible.

Last week, it was so cold inside that I up and took myself to the closest clothing place to buy a light layer of some kind. It was hot outside and end of season, so wasn't expecting too much in the way of choice, let alone sizes that would fit. I ended up getting a men's hoodie - cheaper than the comparatively unattractive women's hoodie, but that's another story - and returned to the scene of the chill for a more comfortable hour or so.

When I got back to Tim's and put on my new hoodie, one of the servers asked if I was cold. I said I was, and she said, "Just as well you have that hoodie". And then, as two ladies were leaving - they were there for both my first and second visit that day - one said to me, "You were smart. We grinned and beared it, but next time we'll bring an extra layer as well."

Maybe that's my role in all this - to inspire the world, one person at a time, to carry an extra layer with them everywhere they go, just in case their thermal comfort is not met when they get there. Either that, or I'll find the thermostat myself and make all the necessary adjustments.

Cool, huh?! At least it's not "Brrrr!"

Retire?

When I read last week that Sylvia Kuzyk, long-time veteran news anchor and weather specialist at Winnipeg CTV, was retiring, I was both ecstatic for her and ponderous for me.

Ecstatic because I know Sylvia - mostly through community events and activities, and I think she's inspiring and fun to chat with. She's also great at what she does and, I dare say, she truly loves what she does. A win win for everyone.

Ponderous because of something she said: "I hate the word retire. It's more about just doing the things I've put in the background for such a long time." Hmmm ....

Reminded me of something my nephew, Matthew, once said when I asked him what he wanted to do when he grew up. "Retire," came the proud and confident response. "Retire?" "Sure. Everyone seems so much happier when they retire 'cause they get to do things they can't do when they are working."

Very insightful for a young boy.

Many people love their jobs, and are happy to stay in them forever - or at least until they retire. They make their way up the proverbial ladder, pursue the same general direction although in other places, or do a complete 360 and try something completely different - and not just once.

But not everyone loves their job. And not everyone can leave a bad job, an uninspiring job, or a job that fails to reflect their talents and aspirations. Responsibilities, expectations and assumptions have a lot to do with that.

Furthermore, not everyone has the schooling or the finances or the support to pursue their passion - and we all know that passion doesn't always pay, hence the divide for many between what they love to do and what they have to do.

Good job or bad, some people can't wait for retirement. A chance to do those things they've put in the background for such a long time.

In an ideal world, we'd all have jobs we love, we'd all have time for our passions, and we'd all be able to blend the joys and possibilities of retirement with the responsibilities and realities of our working lives.

Either that, or we could simply go straight to retirement and get started on those projects, those passions, in that new direction.

I've been playing in that world for a while, but not making much headway because of those pesky responsibilities, expectations and assumptions. But after reading of Sylvia's bold move, working in tandem with my friend Shelagh (who is intent on finishing her own big project), and talking with my Aussie mate Liz, who, while looking for her own 360, said, "You just have to get those speeches done and make it happen!", I'm inspired to fully embrace an early 'retirement' from my current work (editing) and begin in earnest and with passion on my desire to speak and write full time, with some music thrown in for good measure.

Inspired, yes, but also ecstatic and ponderous.

Ecstatic because I've decided not to wait until I retire to retire. Ponderous because I need to clear the proverbial decks and finish up what I currently have on my slate before I can "make it happen".

Can I do it? I've tried before. Hard to cut those ties, turn off those distractions. But I truly believe that this is what I'm meant to do and that it's time for less action and more talk ... if you get what I mean. Absolutely, I will find a way to make it happen.

And this time, PLEASE hold me to it!

So, let me just say, "Congratulations, Sylvia. Thanks to you, Shelagh and Liz for the inspiration. And good luck to us all!"

Reset

Ever have one of those days where you seem to follow one mishap with another?

Today was my day.

Got out of bed and stubbed my big toe - bugger! - on the door frame as I stumbled my way to breakfast. Spilled a glass of orange juice all over the table - and had to wash the tablecloth and placemats. Dropped a piece of toast on the floor. Burnt my lip on some too hot tea. Printed a 10-page document 20 times instead of a single page of that document 20 times. Shredded the wrong draft of a letter - twice! Misspoke in an email and confused a potential client - or at least she was 'potential' until she got the email. And made five attempts to type a four-letter word correctly - no, not one of those four-letter words (although I was thinking of some as I erred).

And all before 1:12 pm.

Days like that can be frustrating, to say the least. But occasionally they are a blessing. Reminders that things are perhaps a little out of control. That it's time to take a break. So, at 1:12 pm, I did exactly that - went for a walk and took in some Vitamin D, breathed and stretched, played the guitar for a bit, and finally got back down to work.

Kind of like a reset button.

And it worked wonders. No more hazardry behaviour, no more mishaps, no more swear-word-inducing moments. Only a sigh of relief that ferried the afternoon to conclusion.

Ah, much better. So much so, that I'm going to hit the reset button again tomorrow - BEFORE the mishaps get the better of me!

"Bugger!"

That's about as far as I'm prepared to go when it comes to swearing in public. None of those other words that offend and annoy - and could cost a lot of money.

Yes, it seems that the key to stopping all those damn curse words is to slap on a fine and publicly admonish the offenders.

In Australia, new laws are in the works that will slap on-the-spot fines of up to $240 on anyone using offensive words or phrases and obnoxious swearing.

According to one of Victoria’s top lawyers, "[this law is] targeted at the sort of obnoxious, offensive behaviour in public that makes life unpleasant for everybody else."

Bugger!

And earlier this week, Avril Lavigne was called out for unleashing some foul language following a baseball game between the home team, the Tampa Bay Rays, and the visiting Cleveland Indians. The crowd wasn't happy - their team lost AND Lavigne's post-game performance was delayed by technical glitches. Apparently, she responded to their booing with "salty language" as part of her profanity-laced explanation for the delay.

According to the Tampa Bay spokesman, "The Rays demand profanity-free performances from all of our concert performers and we are extremely disappointed by the language used in last night's show."

Bugger!

Okay, I admit that I've slipped up from time to time, but it's usually when I'm really angry or upset about something. Or when I stub my big toe. Those mostly four-, sometimes five-or-more-letter words rarely make their way into my everyday public communication, although I do occasionally swear at other drivers on the road - always with the windows up so as to avoid any follow-up confrontation from possible misinterpretation of my word selection.

Personally, I don't get why some people swear as much as they do. I'm sure some of them think they need to swear, that there are no other words they can use and no other ways to express themselves. And I believe that a few make the conscious decision to use every swear word they know so they can be as annoying and obnoxious as possible. And still others are so adept at swearing that they don't even realize when they are doing it.

To all those people, I suggest purchasing a thesaurus - there you will find lots of other words you can use that will save you money and avoid the risk of public admonishment.

Despite our best efforts to curtail the obnoxious, offensive behaviour, it's not likely we'll be successful ... unless the perpetrators make a conscious and active decision to cease and desist. Creative thinking is all that's needed here, but sadly that seems to be in much shorter supply than the number of words available to annoy and offend.

Ultimately, if we want to curtail the foul language, all we can really do is lead by example - don't swear in public, ever - and chose more acceptable alternatives - I like struth, crikey, and, yes, bugger!

If that doesn't work, we can always ignore that which doth hurt offend us and tell ourselves that those words don't mean anything anyway. They are simply the tools of expression for a few angry, frustrated, uncreative people - who don't have a thesaurus and/or drive with their windows up.

And if none of the above have any impact whatsoever, well, there's always fines and public admonishment.

Bugger!

Just dandy!

You know how some things come back to haunt you?

Not always right away, but at some point in your life, you get the sense that you are being paid back for past deeds.

Such was the case yesterday when we were out on the front boulevard.

When I was a little girl, there was a belief that if you picked a seeded dandelion and blew all the seeds off in one breath, you would get whatever wish you made. So, regularly, on the way home from school or playing outside or when visiting friends, I would make a wish, pick an appropriate dandelion, and literally blow it away.

Little did I know I was spreading disaster for homeowners who wanted uninterrupted green grass lawns and dandelion-free gardens ...

... until yesterday, when we spent an hour on our hands and knees, armed with old kitchen knives and wearing comfortable gloves, digging out the little buggers and carefully discarding them in a secure plastic bag. They had not seeded yet, but they would soon, and we wanted to make sure that as much as possible, and for this year at least, we are dandelion free.

Next year, it won't matter so much because we plan to convert our front and back lawns to native gardens, with lots of prairie plants and easy access routes for anyone who wants to enjoy them. But for now, it would be just dandy to have uninterrupted green grass lawns and a dandelion-free garden.

As we de-weeded, I kept thinking back to my youth and all those dandelion seeds I spread in our neighbourhood and beyond. It was a different grass there - kikuyu, known for its rapid growth and aggressive nature, and popular in Australia because it is cheap and drought-tolerant. And kikuyu doesn't like to share with dandelions, which is why I don't remember any in our yard. However, I do remember infestations in lots of other places ... probably some of them courtesy of moi! Sorry.

So, let me just say that if I knew then what I know now, learned at the end of a back-breaking dandelion removal stint on our front boulevard, I would never have actively contributed to the attempted world domination by the dandelion population. But I am going to make up for that now by digging out those little buggers every time they raise their pretty little heads.

And while there might be lots in our neighbourhood, you can rest assured that they won't come from us!

Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

I love movies. And I love movie reviews. I'm always interested to hear what other people think about ones I'm going to see and ones I might see. I don't spend too much time reading someone else's perspective on movies I'm not going to see. You simply can't see them all, right? So, there's got to be some way to keep the list manageable.

Personally, my favourite reviewer is Giles Hardie from the Sydney Morning Herald, and not only because he tackles a lot of Aussie films ... that unfortunately I don't get to see. Giles is plain language, to the point, explores the highs and lows, and employs just enough quirk to make even a bad film sound potentially watchable.

Even so, I try not to let reviews dictate whether or not I see a particular film - I like to make up my own mind. And for sure there are times when a review simply doesn't equate with my experience - anticipated or otherwise.

As a big fan of Jack Sparrow and his crazy antics on the high seas, I was, to say the least, aghast at Randall King's 1.5 star review of the latest installment of "Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides". He spoke of "... lethargic, peg-legged pace, steady-paycheque performances, and a dearth of magic". Ouch!

Okay, so Randall's entitled to his opinion, but "senseless", "weird", "daffy" and "treads water"? Um, I don't know about you, but that's part of why I love the "Pirates" movies so much. They're movies about pirates, their silly and senseless behaviour, weird attire and daffy lines, and yes, they tread water in one way or another as they fight friend and foe, connive to steal and cheat, attempt to trick and deceive, find themselves in all sorts of situations that are plain ridiculous, and they trade allegiances like they were pieces of gold. Ooh, makes me giddy just to think about it!

Good review or not, movies are a great escape. And with so much junk going on in the world today, isn't it better to spend some time drifting "On Stranger Tides" and immersing oneself in some comedy or fantasy or action - or perhaps a combination of all three?

By the way, Randall is not the only one who doesn't like Pirates IV; there are lots and lots who aren't on board with the latest installment - although, in case you were wondering, Giles gave it 3.5 stars. :)

Still, I will not be swayed. For my money, Jack's my man. Makes me laugh, smile, and wish I was a pirate, or at least playing one in the fifth installment - which, judging by the first weekend's take of $256.3 million, there might just be.

"Drink up me hearties, yo ho!"

Two wrongs don't make it right

If you're not paying attention, it's easy to get caught up in the silly goings on that is the world of fame and fortune.

Okay, let me just say that I wouldn't mind a dose of fame and fortune. Been working on it, but so far, unsuccessful in any way that constitutes being able to live without having to worry about money. Successful in other ways, and fortunately, the kind that leaves me unattractive to the world's media. So there are some benefits to relative obscurity!

But getting back to my original thought here. I couldn't help but notice - mostly because it currently features on every print, web and small screen (is 46" still considered small screen?) medium - the mind boggling scenario concerning Arnie and Maria ... and Mildred.

The whole thing is kind of off, but what caught my eye was the claim that Mildred "had kept [the secret] faithfully for 14 years" - as if that's supposed to give her some brownie points in our eyes.

A quick reminder that it takes two to make a child (in most cases), so while Mildred - or at least those who are speaking on her behalf - appear to be painting her as the oh so faithful and innocent party, the act itself and the silence on the matter by both her and Arnie are two wrongs that don't make it right.

It's always the risk when you play with more than one hand. And they should not be surprised that it's finally out in the open, and that the fallout is going to cost a lot and hurt, well, Maria and her children and the boy in question - not to mention those involved in the Terminator franchise, now that Arnie's put that on hold.

Perhaps the moral here is to not do the deed in the first place. But that would be way too simple and obvious, and rooted in common sense - the lack of which appears to be a permanent affliction not restricted to those blessed with fame and fortune.

Fame and fortune is not for everyone. Still, I wouldn't mind giving it a try - but without the cheating and the intense media focus, if that's okay ... and even possible!